问题：Chemistry Jokes
类型：推荐
提问：stone-127
等级：▲
版块：网友资源互助区(Yan,)
信誉：0%
回复：3
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时间：2007-04-10 11:57:17 编辑加入/取消收藏订制/取消短消息举报该贴

1. Two atoms are walking down the street.
Says one atom to the other, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!"
The other says, "Are you sure??"
"Yes, I'm positive!"

2. If H2O is water, what is H2O4?
Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming. . .

3. Rules of the lab
· If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.
· When you don't know what you're doing, do it neatly.
· Experiments must be reproduceable, they should fail the same way each ti
me.
· First draw your curves, then plot your data.
· Experience is directly proportional to equipment ruined.
· Always keep a record of your data. It indicates that you have been worki
ng.
· To do a lab really well, have your report done well in advance.
· If you can't get the answer in the usual manner, start at the answer and
derive the question.
· In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.
· Do not believe in miracles - rely on them.
· Team work is essential, it allows you to blame someone else.
· All unmarked beakers contain fast-acting, extremely toxic poisons.
· No experiment is a complete failure. At least it can serve as a negative
example.
· Any delicate and expensive piece of glassware will break before any use
can be made of it.
4. A physicist, biologist and a chemist were going to the ocean for the first
time.
The physicist saw the ocean and was fascinated by the waves. He said he wanted
to
do some research on the fluid dynamics of the waves and walked into the ocean.

Obviously he was drowned and never returned.
The biologist said he wanted to do research on the flora and fauna inside the
ocean
and walked inside the ocean. He too, never returned.
The chemist waited for a long time and afterwards, wrote the observation, "The

physicist and the biologist are soluble in ocean water".

5. Chemist's last words
And now the tasting test...
And now shake it a bit...
In which glass was my mineral water?
Why does that stuff burn with a green flame?!?
And now the detonating gas problem.
This is a completely safe experimental setup.
Now you can take the protection window away...
Where do all those holes in my kettle come from?
And now a cigarette...

回复人：flychem,★ () 时间：2007-04-15 07:53:26 编辑	1楼
资源不错，加0.3分

回复人：智能仪表,▲ (诚信，承诺，信誉。承诺不实现，信誉也不见。) 时间：2007-05-12 08:55:46 编辑	2楼
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回复人：flychem,★ () 时间：2007-05-12 10:35:30 编辑	3楼
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